I was born in Kolkata, India. I came to the U.S. when I was nine months old on June 29, 2000, which means that today marks 24 years since I arrived here to be a part of my family. Massachusetts will always be my home. I grew up here, and it’s the only home I’ve ever known. My family is the only one I’ve ever known.
Both of my moms have always been there for me. They were the ones who took me to St. Louis for my Selective Dorsal Rhizotomy in 2005, outpatient PT appointments, doctor’s appointments, dentist appointments, and Children’s Hospital Boston.
My life in the United States hasn’t been without its hard times. I’ve gone through surgeries and many other medical procedures, and illnesses. As a child, I rarely understood why I had to endure things that most of my peers didn’t.
I knew I had very little control over who helped me with activities of daily living, even as a child. I would have felt uncomfortable asking a friend’s parents for help using the restroom. In addition, accessibility meant that my friends had to come to my house if we wanted to see each other.
I didn’t realize just how much impacted cerebral palsy me until my younger sibling began to play sports, and attend birthday parties and sleepovers. I was frustrated when I realized that my sibling could go to a friend’s house without wondering how they would get around someone’s house or use the restroom.
It isn’t easy to be disabled. I spend my time managing everything from prescriptions, and Social Security benefits to doctor’s appointments. Being disabled often feels like a full-time job.
At the same time, I am trying to figure out how traditional milestones might look as a disabled person. Right now, I am 24 years old. I am actively seeking employment. I’ve been looking for a job since I was 19 and haven’t been able to find anything.
I also wonder if I’ll ever have a romantic relationship. Will people find someone who has cerebral palsy attractive, especially when I don’t consider myself attractive? The thought of being in an intimate relationship with somebody is scary.
Having a physical disability means that I have to allow people to assist me with my personal care. I don’t particularly enjoy the thought of having my partner help me use the bathroom or get dressed. More than anything, however, I wonder if my partner would see me as a burden. The thought of being alone for the rest of my life saddens me.
Overall, I have had an incredible life here in the United States. I’ve been blessed to have a fantastic family. I have been surrounded by loving people my whole life. My aunts, uncles, grandparents, and cousins have always been there for me. Because my parents adopted me, I have had the pleasure of being an older sister for the past 20 years.
I had a childhood that I look back on with fondness and joy. Despite my challenges, I remember being very happy when I was growing up. I have fond memories of reading books with my parents before bed, and playing with them. I always knew that I was loved. I try my best not to take my family for granted, because not everyone has a loving family.
My education was and still is a big part of my life. I always loved school when I was growing up. I looked forward to learning every day. My favorite subject was language arts.
Throughout my school career, I was fortunate enough to have known many excellent teachers, therapists, and paraprofessionals. I am thankful that I had the opportunity to attend classes with my peers and that my teachers saw me as a whole individual and, more often than not, embraced my disability.
I’ve also met many excellent doctors, PCAs, and therapists. The devotion they’ve all shown me over the years hasn’t gone unnoticed. I am forever grateful to everyone that I’ve worked with.
I have also been fortunate enough to know some pretty amazing friends. My friends have always taken my disability in stride. To them, I’m never a burden or extra work or someone to be pitied.
To all of the people who have loved, cared for, and supported me these past 24 years: I want to say thank you for being a part of my life. I wouldn’t be the person I am today without every single one of you.